What gang problem in L.A.? I'll bet parents love hearing that .44 Calibers are falling out of first graders' jeans during recess. I guess GI Joe's aren't fun anymore...they need to have the real deal.
6-year-old brings loaded handgun to school
Smells Like: California , guns , safetySchools spent $67K on cappuccino machines
Smells Like: budget , Illinois , lunch
Espresso machines are VITAL to the success of the future of our children. Any dollar amount should be approved to make sure we have enough cappuccino in the hands of all school employees. And if you're doing the math, $67,000 can afford the salary of at least two more teachers. But obviously, coffee is more important.
School bus stops at liquor store
Smells Like: alcohol , bus , idiocy , Montana
First, who needs to go to the liquor store at 8 in the morning? Second, who would try and have a middle school kid hide a bottle of booze from the cops for you? Here is a well known fact about school buses: They are huge and yellow! You are not gonna fool anyone rolling one of those babies into the liquor store and think you're getting away with it. Hopefully, when she loses her job and drivers licence, the local bus has a route that swings by there for her.
Detroit School Asks Parents to Donate Toilet Paper
Smells Like: budget , health , Michigan , parents , poop
The economy is still struggling, and kids can't wipe their butt in school. I can only imagine how their budget looks for text books or computers if they can't even afford the stuff you normally assume is stock-piled in the janitors closet. Don't worry though, the principal will still get his/her bonus this year.
Principal Bans Students From Hockey Game
Smells Like: Massachusetts , policy , principal , school spirit , sports
Story: Needham Principal Bans Students From Hockey GameAfter too many complaints that students shouted to the other teams, "You suck!" and "Put away your clipboards!" the principal had enough. Even though this team is a defending national champion, and their opponents probably do suck, such suggestions could not be made by rowdy fans. Obviously, this principal is preparing his students for college and the real world, where fans are mild tempered and well-behaved.
Student brings gun to school, gets tasered
Smells Like: Florida , guns , safety , taser
For many of us, it is now commonplace to hear about guns being brought to school. Even though these stories are now a dime a dozen, we wanted to remind readers that schools are safer than ever. That's why we have a uniformed officer on payroll at virtually every middle and high school.
NY teacher accused of ordering student penis video
Smells Like: cell phone , New York , nudity , sex , teachers , trouble
Some teachers send students out of the class for being disruptive. Others order them to go to the bathroom and record videos of their penis with the teachers cell phone. As if this story isn't horrible enough, maybe this will sweeten the pot- The boy was 11! Who ever said cell phones shouldn't be allowed in school?
6-year-old takes family car after missing bus
Smells Like: bus , parents , safety , Virginia
It's simple: He missed the bus, so he grabbed moms keys (while she was sleeping) and took the family sedan for a joyride. You have to admire his desire to maintain perfect attendance in school, but what kind of parent raises a child to not wear their seatbelt? It's not as easy as when you're playing Grand Theft Auto, huh little buddy?
Classroom locked down after Facebook threat
Smells Like: internet , Michigan , myspace/facebook , panic , safety , threats
Our forefathers had to deal with similar inconveniences, I am sure. This is more than likely just a kid who didn't want to go back to school after winter break. Well, while he is serving his 10 days suspension, he will have more time to finish his World of WarCraft game.
New Years Resolution: Don't stab classmates
Smells Like: Maryland , Ohio , safety , violence
It's the first day back to school for most Americans, and what better way to ring in the new year than to stab a classmate? I know it's hard to roll out of bed the first day back, but it seems it's equally as hard to resist first degree assualt charges. I thought the pen was supposed to be mightier than the sword?
Body found on SC playground
Smells Like: recess , South Carolina , tragedy , weird
And we wonder why some people think Tag might be too dangerous.
School buses fail checkups
Smells Like: bus , Ohio , safety
A school bus can often be described as a death mobile. Pile in dozens of yelling kids and expect a driver to focus on traffic and making wide turns. For fun, throw in a few fuel leaks and broken lights and it makes the trip to school even more interesting. At least Dallas is now adding seat belts to prevent kids from rattling around after every bump and sharp stop. And we were always warned "it's the other drivers you have to watch out for."
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